Going through a divorce can be an extremely tough time. You need to build a support network of friends and family, and most likely, you will receive advice on everything from how much in alimony you should try to get to when exactly you need to file for divorce.
Everyone has advice, especially those who have gone through the process themselves. However, the only person you should really listen to is your attorney. Even if a close friend has divorced as well, every case is different, and something that worked for one person may not work for you.
Friends are not lawyers
There are many intricacies to divorce law, and even if a friend has been in the courtroom, your case may be different. This is especially pertinent if you speak with a friend who lives in another state. Divorce laws can vary from one state to the next, so they may be unaware of differences in New York law.
They cannot be objective
Hiring a lawyer to represent you in court means you receive an objective opinion. This is immensely helpful because it can be clearer what you need to accomplish when you are in the middle of intense emotions. However, your friends cannot remain objective. They will be on your side, and as a result, they may encourage you to take your spouse for everything he or she is worth. This is usually not a viable legal strategy, so you want to maintain a focus on getting through this time quickly and efficiently.
They do not know all the facts
Even if you are an open book, chances are good there are some details you will leave out when talking to friends. Therefore, they will not know the exact financial situation you and your ex are in. Only you, your former spouse and your attorney should be privy to that information.